On being judgmental, part 4

Judgmentalism, mosquitoes, and termites, all have one thing in common. Despite all the problems they cause, God gave them to us to serve a useful purpose.


I recall a story I once read about a man who had suffered a catastrophic train accident. A piece of steel passed through his head, severing the portion of the brain where emotions originate from, the portion that houses the intellect. He fully recovered physically, but he became like the fictional Mr. Spock of Star Trek, a person with no emotions.

He could not respond when people showed love to him. He did not respond to the anger of others. He could not hold down a job. He could not make the simplest decisions, such as whether to wear a red or blue shirt. His ability to make decisions was entirely absent.

Judging and feeling are irrevocably linked. You can't have one without the other. If we feel, then we value. And if we have values, we also judge.

Jesus said "Judge not, in order that you not be judged. For with the judgment you judge others, you yourself will be judged." Jesus did not mean we should never judge, but that when we judge we should do it the way we would like it to be done to us. If we want others to judge us generously, we should judge them generously, too. If we would like others to butt out of our business, then we should stay out of theirs, too. The Golden Rule applies to judging, too.

Nevertheless, there are some times when we must judge. Sometimes our role in life puts us in the position of judging--such as when we are jurors, parents, administrators, or employers. Sometimes, we are called on to render our portion of a collective judgment---when we vote or serve on jury duty. Every soldier on a battlefield is called upon to judge whether the life of the enemy is more important than his own.

We try to judge fairly, but we are not always fair, nor should we be. There are times when we will be prejudiced. We are rightfully prejudiced in favor our spouses and children. No matter what we say, we can never be impartial towards those we love.

We judge constantly in the ordinary aspects of life. We choose one color of shirt over another. We choose roses instead of daisies, Fords over Chevies, a vacation by the beach instead of a vacation in the mountains. If we had no feelings in these matters, these choices would be impossible. If we have feelings in these matters, then we will judge according to those feelings.

The idea that we should never judge is simply wrong. It isn't that we judge, it's how we judge that matters.

So how do we judge?

1. We judge when it is our business to judge. We all have feelings about certain people and certain behaviors. We may not approve of homosexuality or adultery. I certainly do not. But when I encounter homosexuals or adulterers, no matter what my feelings may be regarding their behavior do not matter. They are not mine to judge. God is the one who will judge them, not I. I must put my feelings towards their behavior aside and treat them simply as human beings.

2. We judge when we have all the facts. The kinds of judgments that cause the most mischief are those that are made quickly and in ignorance of the whole truth. Suppose, for example, we know a woman who has moved out on her husband. The husband appeals to our sympathy, saying the marriage bond is forever, and she was in sin. What we may not know is that he has been physically and emotionally abusing her for years. Until we actually know both sides, we should not judge.

3. When we must judge, we should to is with leniency and generosity. With the judgment we give others, we will be judged.

Imagine there is a future society where all cases in court were tried, not before a judge or jury, but by a supercomputer. The computer would digest all the evidence of a crime, calculate probabilities, and draw a conclusion of guilt or innocence. We would still need judges to decide upon appropriate sentence. That is because judges exist to grant leniency, not punishment. Every criminal could receive the maximum sentence, but it is up to the judge to decide whether that sentence should be lightened due to other circumstances.

Our judgment, too ought to be about mercy, not punishment. We could ostracize a friend for doing us harm, but we do not have to. We can choose to forgive. We can believe that a casual comment was sarcastic or cutting, or we could take it as face value, and give the person the benefit of a doubt. Any fool can take offense--it takes a wise man to forgive. If we have the intellect to accurately judge the offenses to others, then we ought to have the good sense to overlook them unless it is absolutely imperative that we do so.



We cannot help but judge. It is part of our emotional nature to do so. But do we have the good sense to leave off judging the servants of another, and mind our own business? Let's attend to our own personal courtrooms, and leave the rest to God.