How to Pray for Another Person

In every church there's a prayer list people with special needs, who we are to pray for daily.  This is harder than it sounds.  If all we do is recite to God a list of names, prayer seems a monotonous and futile chore.  After all,  God knows these people better than we do! While I would never suggest we not pray for them,  I have to ask--how effective can such an mechanical approach to prayer be?  Praying for someone is more than reading off a list.  It has to be something deeper.
 Praying for people is more than praying for their problems.  Frankly, we can never be sure that we know the real problem, because it is often not what it appears to be. Real prayer implies special interest in individuals.  Don't just pray for the lost, pray for your lost neighbor next door. Don't just pray for the poor--pray for the beggar you met on the street. Prayer is an empathic process in which we become acquainted and involved with real people as we pray.The Lord's prayer in Matthew 6 gives us a pattern for prayer not only for overall needs, but also for individuals.  

 "Our Father in Heaven"

Don't rush into in prayer for others.  Take time to praise God first.  Prayer is not just wishing someone well, but bringing them to the throne of God.  Before we do this we need to get to the throne of God ourselves, through praise and worship.  Do not pray for an individual need until you have first settled your heart in thoughts on God.  Our impatience wants to be done with prayer, to rush in, leave our concerns, and get out.  But effective prayer lingers in the mind on the nature and thoughts of God.
 "Hallowed be Thy name"  

Spend time in graceful contemplation of the person we are remembering.  The name of God is His nature, His divine attributes. As we pray for an individual, we need to see them as an expression of God's divine nature.   

Sin affects us all, and we are thorough sinners, but we are also made in the image of God.  God's forgiveness in Christ makes it possible for us to overlook the sins of individuals and focus on their God-like qualities.
This is empathy, the ability we have to see the world though others' eyes.  Empathy is an essential part of a true ministry of intercessory prayer. 
Before we pray for needs,  seek to understand the world from that person's perspective. Respect the things about that person which are good,  holy and truthful.  Try to imagine what it is like to feel what they feel, see what they see, and do what they do.  Celebrate the things about them which celebrate God.  Youth reflects the power of God, Age reflects the wisdom of God.  Creativity celebrates the creativity and diversity of God.  Learn to appreciate the things which are like Him in all people. 
This can be done for our enemies as well as our friends. It is good to remember that even the worst person on earth still bears something of the name of God in them.  For that reason, they are deserving of our love and appreciation.
"Thy Kingdom Come"   

Though we all are possessed of a portion of divine qualities, we are all fallen short of it.  Imagine what the person who is the object of your prayer might be, if he or she were fully in line with what God had for them.  Then, turn those thoughts to God. 
"Thy will be done"

 In this fallen world, we are all both sinners and victims.  Some of what happens to us in this world was not God's perfect will for us, but the result of our interaction with fallen people and fallen creation.  Pray that God's perfect will be done in their lives, so they can have the potential to realize their best and most perfect lives.
"Give us Thy daily bread" 

  Here is where we get into the physical and emotional needs which this person has, whether it be for healing, food,  a job,  etc.  We are praying not just for providence, but for them to have enough, so they can fully realize the life that can be theirs, if they live in submission to Him, and His kingdom.
"Forgive us our debts"  

 Unforgiveness holds us back from God's promises in our lives,  both our own unforgiveness, and not being forgiven.  It is impossible to pray for a person with all our hearts if we do not forgive them from the heart.  Pray that God will free them from the bondage of past sins,  both their own and others.
"Lead us not into temptation"  

 A person cannot realize theif full potential in God's kingdom if he or she falls into temptation. Pray that the person will have the strength to resist the false trails along the way to a full and meaningful life in submission to God.

"Deliver us from the Evil (one)"   

This is a recognition that there is an enemy--Satan--who is trying his hardest to get us off the path.  All prayer is warfare, since it is our own direct defense against Satan. Pray for protection, and thank God for the authority against the evil one that was given to us through the blood of Christ. 

Prayer for one person is not as easy as a short prayer lifted up now and then. To truly and fully pray for God's blessing takes time effort, involving the mind, will, feelings, and imagination.  To pray for others is not something we should take on lightly. But as we practice, it gets easier. 

My prayer is that I might have someone--anyone--who would take on the burden of prayer on my behalf, and that God would use me to take on that burden for some others.  Then I can start to think of them the way God sees them, as His children who need His help to be fully what He called them to be. 

How to Have a Godly Argument

The church at Corinth was a mess.  The people came from Jewish and Gentile backgrounds, including many which combined religious fervor and moral apathy.  For that reason,  there was a constant  string of arguments.  The church was so quarrelsome, that they wrote their old pastor Paul to help sort it all out.  The result of this was 1 and 2 Corinthians.  These book are a catalog of quarrels, some petty and some important.  Paul writes in 1 Cor 1:10 

"I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought."

Some people liked Paul better than Apollos, or Peter better than  Paul.  Then there was some wise guy (there always is) who says "Yeah,  well I'm on Jesus' side." 

Paul shows no interest in who's right or wrong.  He's  only interested in the spirit behind it.  1 Cor 2:12-15

"We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us. This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words.  The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned. The spiritual man makes judgments about all things, but he himself is not subject to any man's judgment."

Paul recognizes what is really going on here.  This isn't about who is right or wrong but who is important or unimportant it's about power and status,  not truth.  

Disagreements and differences of opinions are healthy things.  Giving and receiving criticism benefits the giver and the receiver, if it is taken in the right spirit.  In an argument,  either both win or both lose. We either come to a greater mutual understanding or we do not.  But the quarrels in most churches are about one group getting mastery over  another. In Corinth, the self important co-opted the reputations of Peter, Paul, and Apollos, not to mention Jesus,  to support their own moral and intellectual superiority.

Paul reminds them that if we are Spiritual, we don't need to be proven right or wrong. Our self-worth comes from Jesus, not our status in the church.  1 Cor 2:14

"The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned."

If we don't have the Spirit,  we are forever looking for validation from being right or being accepted. We look for proof we are better than others by winning arguments or getting authority. 

Arrogance and humility cannot coexist. We are either proud or submissive to the Spirit.  We can't be both at the same time.

Then Paul goes on to other problems.  In chapter 6,  Paul talks about the lawsuits between believers. They ought to be able to settle it among themselves, he says.  But it isn't the lawsuit itself that is his proof of their unspirituality.  It is their need for it.   1 Cor 6:7-8

"The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?  Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers. "

Lawsuits are a form of warfare.  If we have to sue and defend ourselves against lawsuits from brothers, then we have already been defeated, since we have lost fellowship with our brothers.  We have already lost our spiritual authority.

There were many arguments in Corinth--about hair,  meat,  worship styles,  spiritual gifts,  communion.  Paul never suggests that they should not have those arguments.  In fact, Paul doesn't mind entering the debate himself.  But what is more important to him is how we have them.  If our debate is founded on a loving relationship, then we  can grow closer through the debate. But when arguments drive us apart,  we are nonspiritual.  We do not have the Spirit of God.    

Disagreements are not our problem.  Or problem is valuing trivialities over people.  The goal of the Christian life is not to have answers for every question, but to love God with all our hearts, and to love our neighbor as much as we love ourselves.  It's better to lose an argument than to lose a friend.  

The Faith Inventory, Results

I have just concluded tabulating my unscientific faith inventory poll.  (see here)  In no way can this poll be considered scientific, nor is this poll typical of anyone but the ones who answered them.  I do not know who answered it,  so I cannot be certain what the answers really mean.  Nevertheless, I found the answers enlightening. 

First some background. I am in the middle of writing a book on  faith called The Faith Matrix.    i designed this inventory to be part of one of the appendices.  My goal is simply to get people thinking about what is most important in their lives. 
The overall definition of "faith" I am using came from  Tillich's concept of faith as one's "ultimate concern."  Belief and faith are different. Belief is what we accept as intellectually true. Faith is what we actually use as a basis for our lives. Often what we believe is the truth and what matters to us are two different things.  Our real faith on which we build out lives is  matters most, what we put above all else,  what gives us the most joy, and what really keeps us going when times are tough.   The goal of this is to help reveal what is  our ultimate concern. I am not at all sure that this test did it. I welcome any and all advice. 

The people who took this test were not typical--mostly my students, my minister and professor friends,  myself and my wife.  Most of them are at least professing and practicing Christians, and  a great many are  professional Christians as well.  Therefor, it comes as no surpse that  "God" figures prominently in their ultimate concern. As one friend told me "I wanted to put something else, but I could tell that the 'right' answer is supposed to be 'God.' So I put it"  I asked people not to think about their answers but to put the first thing that popped into their head s.  I also assured them that this was completely anonymous.  Even so, the self-censoring I believe is probably huge.  
Here are the answers, and what I make of them. 

1. Who would you die for? Most people said that they would die for their faith before anything though one said for their family, and one put "other"  As I tell my classes,  dying for Jesus is relatively easy, though.  Living for Him is a lot harder.
2. Who would forgo comfort for?  All said "God" but this is surprising, and a little hard to believe. We are a people who do not fast, rarely pray,  and seldom tithe, yet we are think that we would most willingly give up candy bars of Jesus told us to.

3. Which of these gives me the most joy and satisfaction in life?  All of the answers were the same "being in a right relationship with God."  Again, I sincerely hope this is so.  But somehow, I doubt it.  This is what we are supposed  to answer, but then why do we have so many other things that distract us from time with God?
4.   Why do I work?  Here the answers started to get interesting.  Two  put "so my family will prosper.  One put "to have money to pursue my interests One put "other" and the rest put, of course, God.   It would make sense that who we work for, who gives us the greatest satisfaction, and who we die for would be the same, but many  of the responders really could not say this.  It may be that most people think of work as something we just endure, that has nothing to do with our true selves,  but it may be that many of us are not sure why we are working.
5. What would you  put first in your introduction?  We got the most diversion from the expected response.   Half put their religion, four put their occupation or their interests, and two put 'other."   It may be that people were thinking of what others thought, here, and that is understandable. What I hoped was that people would put what they wanted people to know most about them.  

As I said,  this is all very unscientific.  But if this is in any way indicative of what a larger group would say,  it may suggest that we are not really as committed to God first as we think we are,  or allow ourselves to express.  If faith is our ultimate concern in life, and if our faith is in God,  then He really ought to be our joy, our motivation, our purpose for living. But saying God is our ultimate, and Him being our ultimate are two different things.  It may be more an expression of the ideal than the real. If the ideal is ever to become real, then we have to know where our hearts really are.

For most of us, having a consistent faith is more of a goal than a destination.  Our out heart (which the Bible calls "deceitful") doesn't  knowing how far from that ideal we actually fall.  My hope is that this little quiz will help help remind us that we need a more consistent, wholehearted faith.  

Later, I'll be posting another quiz to help us see where our faith is strongest.  Hope you will take it.  Meanwhile, I'd love to see some of your thoughts.  

Welcome to Esalvation.com

I was a counselor at a Billy Graham crusade when I was seventeen.  That was when I first learned to share the Gospel.  Later I learned to use the Four Spiritual Laws, that famous little mustard yellow booklet with the illustrations that has led millions to a commitment to Christ. I also learned the Roman Road, the Bridge,  Evangelism Explosion, and the Gospel glove.  All of them are ways of telling people the plan of Salvation, the road to God through Christ.   I still believe them all.  I have not changed in this one little bit.

Nevertheless, there is something has always bothered me.  Receiving Jesus is the most important decision in life, yet it seems so formal, so mechanical when we present it.  Christianity is not a hell insurance policy. It is an encounter with the living Christ. 

To illustrate,  think about the second most important decision we make in life--who we are going to marry.

Imagine logging onto an online dating site and seeing this profile:

"Hello, I'm(blank) and I have wonderful news for you!

"I love you and have a wonderful plan for your life!    

Until now, your separation from me has made that plan impossible. You distance has separated you from me.

"Fortunately, there is a solution!  You can reach me through this web site.  All you have to do is email me, and I am yours for life!

"Here is a sample email you can send:

"'(Blank), I recognize that I'm lonely.   This is wrong. I confess that you are my best hope for matrimony.   I want you as my husband.  From now on, I will be your loyal and obedient life. Thank you for taking me as your bride. Amen."

Check this box to indicate your agreement."

Sounds crazy, right?  If it is crazy for our second greatest decision, then why do we think it sufficient for our first great decision?   We assume in marriage that we should actually personally meet the person we are marrying, before we commit.  Sd do not enter into a lifetime partnership lightly. If we did,  then it is unlikely that we would last very long.

Yet somehow  we think that a trip down the church aisle or a prayer at the back of the book is sufficient to secure an eternal relationship with the Father.

Christianity cannot be this casual. It is a permanent, serious relationship we ought to take  seriously. We should encourage people to get to know Christ before they commit to Him. We should be encouraging caution to the altar, not speed.  People should fall in love with Jesus, not come to Him in moment of fear or desperation. Maybe this is why we see so many people fall away after initial  decisions. 

The facts of quick evangelism is correct--the feelings are not . We need to be overwhelmed by Jesus, dazzled by His presence and awestruck by His authority.  Then we will come to Him changed in heart and ready to begin a new life.  We will treat evangelism of the lost with more seriousness than liking His Facebook page. 

Here's the catch. If we are to help others experience Jesus, we have to be experiencing Him ourselves, not as a legal loophole for hell, but as a living,  loving ,  overwhelming Presence in our lives. 

Are we experiencing Jesus, is He truly the center of our lives?  He is more than a decision, He is a friend, a companion, and a Lord.